Refusing to Fight
A Meditation on the Strength Card and the Archetype Behind It
“I yell at you more because you are weak!” He says red faced, holding a stuffie about to throw it.
“Weak?”
“You don’t yell. You don’t fight back. You aren’t strong.”
Suddenly, unbidden, the Rider-Waite-Smith Tarot “Strength” card image popped into my head. Unbidden.
I paused. This has never happened to me before. I’m someone who struggles with mental images.
The novelty shocked me enough to change the typical fight or flight response.
I took a deep breath.
I summoned all my strength. It felt nearly impossible, but I lowered my voice and my body. I tried to lower my heart rate and project a soft, calm confidence--which was hard because my insides were tensing and raging.
“Buddy, strength isn’t fighting. Strength is refusing to fight”
What was the picture that inspired my behavior change? (insert rws strength card here)
The woman is the picture of calmness and gentleness. She has tamed the lion, a symbol of power, raw emotion, and aggression. She gently holds its jaw—its most powerful and deadly aspect closed while it submits. I’ve always liked the yellow background as it conveys a sense of joy in the stillness.
The card calls on an archetype, a core aspect of the human experience embedded into our psyches. Archetypes cover the entire range of human experiences and are as old as time, but Carl Jung is explicitly credited with defining and introducing the concept to modern psychology.
Today was my day to call on the archetype of strength.
After difficult moments with the kids, I like to debrief with them and work on relationship repair. But first, I have to debrief myself.
While sitting with this one, our last Crone Moon Pull in Aries crossed my mind. Wasn’t I supposed to release Strength this cycle?
“When we think of strength, especially in light of Aries, we think of raw brute strength and power. However, Bob and the bear are asking us to see the other type of strength. Quiet, steady, inner strength.”
But the Crone Moon Pull was asking us to release strength?
“Inner strength has been with us all along, and we need to release the feeling that we can ONLY access it and succeed if we are dependent on others.”
Mars, the God of War, rules Aries. He typifies strength through brute force. Fighting back. Yelling. Exactly what my son was asking of me. Reflecting on the Aries Crone Moon Pull, I was explicitly asked to release that kind of strength. The kind others are asking me to project. To be the mama bear, teaching my baby duckling to fly by silently holding space for him.
In this moment, I found my Crone Moon Pull release.
This moment and others like it are why I use tarot daily and share the monthly Crone Moon Tarot pulls with you. The cards don’t predict the future. They don’t tell us what to do. They give us access to a deep-seated way of knowing and reflection on our human experience. Daily practice gave me the exposure I needed to find this archetype in the moment. To learn from it. To act on it.
Archetypes aren’t all sunshine and rainbows. There are darker shadow sides. For example, my son was expecting and encouraging the shadow side of strength. He wanted me to “Come to the Dark Side” a la Darth Vader. It would have been easy to do; to slip into yelling, standing over him, threatening punishment. A more subtle shadow would be the silent treatment and “staying strong” to inflict a different kind of emotional pain.
We cannot have the positive of an archetype without the shadow. Just like we can’t go in the sun without our own shadow. Our best chance to avoid “the dark side” is to familiarize ourselves with the archetypes and recognize the response we choose in each situation.
When I first got into tarot, I’d never heard the word archetype. All I knew was about a year into my daily practice I saw a real change in how I responded to stressful situations. Learning about archetypes deepened my understanding and practice further, allowing me to visualize archetypes in the moment and make a conscious choice about how to respond on what used to be unconscious instinct.
The Crone Moon in Virgo pull is coming up in two days. I invite you to join me in this self-reflection. Skeptics—the Virgo moon pull is the perfect place to jump in because it is focused on analysis, details, and being of service.
Let me be of service to you by walking you through the archetypes that arise. We can all practice recognizing them in ourselves in the coming month.
And watch for a special deck that will help us in our archetypal exploration.
The content on Crone Powers is for informational and entertainment purposes only. It does not constitute medical advice. I am a doctor, but I AM NOT YOUR DOCTOR. Always consult your medical and mental health professionals before ADDING—NEVER SUBSTITUTING—spiritual modalities to your care. Remember, woo only works when you do the work.
The views and opinions expressed here are my own and do not represent those of my employer or any institution with which I am affiliated.